Yesterday was a lot more difficult than I expected it to be. For the first time since my sister’s cancer diagnosis, we all went to church as one big family. From the moment I walked in and saw her face, I already knew how the service was going to go. She was in pain, and she was already overwhelmed. So instead of focusing on the service, I worked to make her laugh. I told her about something our mother did that was her typical behavior, I showed her a sweet message from one of my students that was directed towards her, and told her about my newest shirts that were added to my collection. Yet even as I talked and shared, I saw her wincing in pain. This is my superhero sister. She’s not supposed to go through this; she’s supposed to be indestructible.
To put it bluntly, I was an accidental and delayed birthday gift to my mother. When she came to America as a mother to four children, the last thing she had envisioned was having another child. Yet, four years later, on a beautiful September afternoon, out came Michelle, baby number five. I completed a family that my mother had thought was complete in Jamaica, but God had other plans. As the youngest of five kids, I was entitled to many glorious benefits, including four additional babysitters, no chores, and siblings who were old enough to spoil me. Yes, I learned at an early age that there were perks to being the baby. However, as time changes, people change, and the “perks” that I once thought I had became burdens and reasons for tension. My relationships with several of my siblings have faded into oblivion, and now all that remains is the relationship that I have with my middle sister, Ionie.
While she does know what it felt like to be the baby, she only remained the youngest for about five years. What I cannot imagine is what it feels like to be her, the middle child. She is both the middle girl and the middle child, with one brother and one sister before her, and one brother and one sister after her. Her role in our family is that of the connector, the glue that holds us together and sane. Similar to our mother, she has gone to great lengths to ensure that we would never go without. She is often ignored or forgotten about, not by us, but by those who gravitate towards the dynamic personalities of my mother’s other four children. In fact, it wasn’t until recently that people had learned how to correctly pronounce her name (eye-own-ee). Despite what many saw in the foreground, Ionie has always been working diligently in the background. She is the backbone of our family, always there whenever we need help… and now she is the one who needs our help.
There’s something to be said about relationships that change abruptly for whatever reason. As humans, we adapt to and become accustomed to the role we play in various situations and environments. We know our place, and we play that role well… until change comes. When change comes, we naturally struggle, squirming and frantically trying to adjust to what is our new new. For my family, we are prayerfully trying to navigate becoming the support system that my sister will need to battle and defeat bladder cancer.
Will this be easy? No.
Will this be inexpensive? Also, no.
But, with God, will this be possible? Yes. 🙌🏾
Growing up, Ionie and I would watch cartoons together. I write that sentence lightly because, let’s be honest, not only do I barely remember those days, but I also did not really watch the shows. Then, much like now, I did a lot of things because I desired to be in the company of others. While I’m sure my sister was locked into the plot of whatever show we were watching, I was just enjoying time with my big sister. If I’m not mistaken, my sister loved Wonder Woman and Thunder Cats. Since I know nothing about cats, I’ll focus on Diana Prince of Themyscira… better known as Wonder Woman.
Princess Diana of Themyscira first appeared in comics in 1941. She is an Amazon princess who was sculpted by Queen Hippolyta and brought to life by Greek deities (or known as the daughter of Hippolyta and Zeus). Diana has godlike strength, durability, speed, reflexes, and flight. She has powerful weapons and grace beyond words. Now that I am looking at my sister as the superhero that I’ve always known her to be, I want to highlight her strengths. Much like Diana, Ionie is from another land, coming to America for a specific purpose and reason. Ionie’s abilities include superhuman math skills and stealth-like concern for others. Her weapons of choice are her Ticonderoga pencils, used to correct the errors of the world, and her laminating machine, which is used to seal in all that is good and right in the world. Ionie’s role in life is to serve as an emissary of peace, equity, and hope for our youngest and most vulnerable learners. She gets her strength from God and is resilient and secretly powerful.
Much like Wonder Woman, Storm, Black Widow, and others, difficulties and opposition have arisen in Ionie’s life… but victory for her has already been determined long before her battle even began.
As this year continues to advance, I am grateful for the lessons and blessings that God has bestowed upon us. The tests and health scares have been enormous, but God has been faithful. My superhero of a sister will begin her treatment tomorrow, and I am rejoicing right now in her soon-to-come victory.
Rejoice with us, Beloved.
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