Every plan that I had made for the 11 days of Christmas Break fell through…
As a teacher, when I knew the break was approaching, I pulled out my planner and- in my purple ink- solidified every plan that I intended to complete. Each day had its own activity and rest would be built into some of those days.
I started simple. On Thursday I would travel to Baltimore for photography, over to West Virginia to pick up vegan sooshi, and then back home to edit the photos and deliver them to my client. I arrived at the shoot location early to shoot some location pics and was numbed by a deadly combination of cold temperatures and an unwavering urge to pee. I tried to work as efficiently as possible, but with each move, my body reminded me of those two things. Eventually a trusting man opened a door for me and I was able to quench one of my urges (thank you, sir!). Once finished in the ladies’ room, I wrapped up the shoot and traveled back towards home. A call from my boyfriend changed my travel plans… and ultimately the course of my next few days.
I’ll spare you the details of the other 10 days and just say this, my break did not go as planned. Yet as I sit here on the first Monday of 2022, I am forced with the realization that plans and dreams are not the same thing.
Langston Hughes asked, “what happens to a dream deferred?” This is a question that I did not fully understand until adulthood. Essentially the question is asking, “what happens to our dreams when we continue to put them off and fail to bring their truths into fruition?” Well, what happens to them? Do you know? The truth is, I am terrified of finding out that answer. And because of my fear, I plan; I tend to over create schedules, tasks, and lists so that I can control the dreams that I have in my mind and heart.
Yet somehow I am under the very distinct impression that God and I are on a different page about my dreams…
As the Lord allows, I will spend January and the entirety of 2022 focused on the mantra, “Dare to Dream” and I will spend this time fully actualizing the dreams that He has spoken over my life. In my sleeping hours, God has revealed many things to me and I am equally terrified and excited to watch everything come to life.
Beloved, what would your life be like if you simply dared to dream? What would be different in your life if you just let go and followed your dreams? Are you unsure? It’s ok, you have about 363 days (including today) to think about this…
Today is a very special day for me, well, for us. Today marks five years since God birthed God Happened To M.E. from deep within me. To be honest, when He did, I thought He meant something COMPLETELY different from what I’ve experienced over these years but, here we are. What I have learned over these years is that with each day that I am here, I have another opportunity to live, learn, laugh, and love again.
There are so many things that I wanted to be in place for this day. I wanted my ministry to be booming and solely funding my lifestyle. I wanted to be a successful author and speaker, travelling the world to tell my life story. I wanted to have a team surrounding me, helping me to spread mental health awareness to all who would listen. I wanted so much to have had happened, but none of my wishes came true… yet.
Instead, what happened was so much better. I got into a car accident that left me broke (financially), broken (physically), jobless, and eventually homeless. God broke chains of depression and bondage, allowing me to live FREE for the first time in my life. I was introduced to the school system and God personally opened and walked me through every door that He intended for me. I met young ladies who shared stories and a heart similar to mine, forging relationships that carry on to today. I finally understood and accepted God’s call to ministry. I self-published two books (co-authoring a third) and was published in two literally writing mediums (Flash Fiction Aficionado and FREED Magazine). Simply put, I watched my life fall apart, just to have God put it all back together.
It was truly all a dream. A dream that I had at one point, which God allowed to become a beautiful reality. Where and who I am today are far beyond anything that I could have imagined. I dared to dream and to trust God on this day five years ago and I implore you to do the same.
My friend, welcome to 2022! I pray that it is filled with God’s unrestricted blessings over your life and that everything that you dare to dream becomes a divine reality.
Happy New Year and Be blessed.