The past few days have been… inconvenient.
On Wednesday past I was honored to deliver the Wednesday Word of Encouragement for my church. I shared a brief (about eight minutes long) message about how we should praise God, even during our seasons or moments of inconveniences. I came from Genesis 37 and talked about how Joseph was blessed to be a blessing even during his 13 years of inconvenience after being sold into slavery by his brothers. The concept of praising God for our inconvenience came to me after I read another devotional message by Kayla Ferris through the First 5 app. It changed my life! I cannot stop thinking about the lesson and I am literally seeing its importance in everything that I do, in every area of my life.
Hence, my past few days being, well, inconvenient.
On the first half of the week I experienced an emotional breakdown when I finally realized just how hard it is to advocate for mental health… especially my own. May is Mental Health Awareness and I never imagined that I would be spending my days trying to tell people that rest is an essential part of every employee within my company. Depression, ADHD, and PTSD are all considered disabilities according to the EEOC… and they just so happen to be three diagnoses that belong to M.E. And of course, those just so happen to be three things that are impossibly hard to prove. Yet there I was on Monday and Tuesday, trying to gather documentation to prove that I have these conditions and that rest is essential to my well-being. By the time Tuesday night drew to an end, I finally felt at ease, knowing that God truly intends to use this time for His Kingdom.
But it is so inconvenient.
For more reasons that I choose to explain right now, I was home on Wednesday and able to watch the broadcast of the Wednesday Word. I listened with closed eyes after realizing that something was wrong with the video display. After creating FOUR different videos I had finally decided on one that expressed my joy and love for those that were watching. I was so excited… and then the video messed up. For the entire eight minutes that I spoke, the audio worked well but the video was jumpy. I was so embarrassed. I was so disappointed. I was so inconvenienced.
God, I know this week has been a lesson in praising You for the inconvenience, but was that really necessary? Couldn’t we have just made this real some other way?
Apparently not. Apparently, God had decided that this was the week that He would pull out all the stops and show me what He meant when He said that this year would truly be a year of explanation. As cliche as it sounds, God told me that “hindsight is 2020” and that this year would explain why I’ve experienced every other moment in my life.
So far He has not disappointed… it’s just been inconvenient.
Even still, as I sit here typing my emotions away, I can’t help but see the “God” in all of this.
Beloved, did you know that God can use everything for His good? Every red light that we encounter, delay, “no”, or unfavorable answer is actually just God’s way of saving us, sparing us, or setting us up for greater. What I love about the story of Joseph in Genesis is that it began with a vision with God and, even years later, ended with the fulfillment of that vision. God showed Joseph what would later come, used the cruel intentions of others to further Joseph, allowed Joseph’s gift to elevate him, and then fulfilled every promise that He had made him.
It’s all for His good and our good, even if it’s inconvenient.
The reality is, I would love it if life were easy and simple; filled with more good than bad, more happy than sad, more laughter than tears. But that’s not life. Life is hard, rough, and confusing. Just when we think we have a handle on things, something comes along to shake things up and sit us on our tails. Life is… but God is greater.
As we continue on this journey, we must pause to see how God is working, even in the inconvenient. I can promise you one thing, no matter how hard things get, God is there….
…even in the inconvenient.