As I sat in the small waiting room, I knew something was wrong, but I didn’t realize how bad it would be. In that moment, that waiting room became the story of my life. I felt the walls closing in on me, and the silence of the space deafened my unsuspecting ears.

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“It is benign.”

Those were the words that the nurse, Pam, had uttered when she returned to me in that waiting room. She told me that the clusters of calcification in my left breast were benign but that an ultrasound was needed for my right breast. Her insistent attempts to lighten the mood only made me more concerned about what was to come in my right breast. The density in that breast was making it difficult for the radiologist to see anything in the current imaging. By having the ultrasound, they would be able to determine the condition of my breast. I wasn’t nervous, per se, but I was definitely alert in that moment.

My Love and I were separated by a bearing wall yet I closed my eyes and imagined that he was with me. In my mind, he was holding my hand with one hand- totally for me, not him- and scrolling through social media with the other. As he would scroll, he would share stories/content that would be beneficial to us both. That he would do to entertain both us, knowing that if my mind was busy, I wouldn’t think about the worst possible outcome. He would be right. He’s always right. Even when he’s wrong. And he would be wrong in that moment. Yes, holding his hand would get me to stop thinking about the possible bad news that could come from the ultrasound, but it wouldn’t and couldn’t eliminate the wait.

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Beloved, I need you to hear me clearly when I say this: there is a blessing in the wait. So often we view waiting in a negative way, thinking that we’ve either done something wrong or that bad news is at the other end of a wait. The reality is, in a waiting season, God is perfecting His great work within us. Even though my Love was not with me in the waiting room, I was not alone. God was with me the entire time and He was comforting me in my wait. He was using that time to help steady my heart and ready me for what was to come. If there had been no wait, fear might have had a time to worsen; because there was a wait, God had time to work.

To be honest, it’s not a matter of IF God will place you in a waiting season, but a matter of WHAT will you do in that time? It is my prayer, Sweet Friend, that in your wait, you worship God and let Him work.

Be blessed. .